Reflexion

by The Caulden Road

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Do you prefer physical media? This title is available on CD at dftba.com/TCR

Special thanks to Gardener, Darryl Kinley, Abby Simons, Raven Zoe, Valerie Zadjenko, and the "All I Am" Choir: Anna, Candy, Sarah, Aaron, Katie, Kenz, Alex, Greg, Eddie, and Karen.

Artwork: Alan Lastufka

credits

released November 13, 2015

Executive Producer: Alan Lastufka

Producer & Mix Engineer: Christian Caldeira

Mastered by Stephen Marsh

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about

The Caulden Road

The Caulden Road is the collaborative music project of Alan Lastufka and Christian Caldeira.

© 2011-2016 The Caulden Road. All Rights Reserved.

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Track Name: All I Am
the years wore through us both together
words it seems don't make good seams
like thin and cheap imitation leather
tearing away from this old routine

now I keep on tryin’
to forget what you said but not how you said it
retracing every line
in every letter you sent 'til I can finally admit it

got all these scattered pieces
pieces that don't go
with all the other pieces
pieces that I know

I tried holding on through the weary weather
but now it seems we don't fit that dream
like colors fade in a vintage sweater
all that remains are glitchin‘ memories

now I keep on tryin’
to forget what you said but not how you said it
retracing every line
in every letter you sent 'til I can finally admit it

got all these scattered pieces
pieces that don't go
with all the other pieces
pieces that I know

memories flash before my eyes and I can't take it
knowing the words you said were lies and seein’ you fake it
you fed me hope so I'd exhale, told me patience would prevail
I held on tight but slipped away from all of you and everything

got all these scattered pieces
pieces that don't go
with all the other pieces
pieces that I know, yeah

ain't prayin' to a savior for us
(these pieces they don't go)
just lookin' for a stranger to trust
(with any pieces that I know)
ain't prayin' to a savior for us
(your pieces just don't go)
just lookin' for a stranger to trust
and give 'em all I am
Track Name: Can't
he can't see clearly now...
through love-tinted eyes...
she gets him every time...

he can’t articulate and put into words
just how she always made him melt
or how each time she found it easy to hurt
and somehow she knew that he wouldn’t tell

left him molded and folded, pasted and cut
left him blinded by everything she said was love
her favorite game became arranging his edited heart
she knew he'd take it, she’d fake it, he’d fall apart

he can’t see clearly now, clearly now
through love-tinted eyes, tinted eyes
she gets him every time, every time
with her erotic, robotic, hypnotic, bedroom lies

he can't see clearly now...
through love-tinted eyes...

he can’t depressurize or vividly dream
with these nightmares always running wild
in a wash of hopeful past coulda beens
he’s tuned out, withholding all of his smiles

he’s destroyed, bruised and broken, tattered and torn
she sits alone, breaking hearts in the eye of the storm
tears falling down became the sign of a change in his eyes
her love is trouble, he struggles to say goodbye

he can’t see clearly now, clearly now
through love-tinted eyes, tinted eyes
she gets him every time, every time
with her erotic, robotic, hypnotic, bedroom lies

you gotta wake up, wake up
we gotta wake up, wake up

you wanna feel that fire burn (fire burn)
when the lights go down (when the lights go down)
without some oil for the flame (for this flame)
it's been drying out (and we're dying now)

he can see clearly now, clearly now
through love-tinted eyes, tinted eyes
she gets him every time, every time
with her erotic, robotic, hypnotic, bedroom lies

erotic bedroom lies
robotic bedroom lies
hypnotic bedroom lies
Track Name: The Wind
she saw him coming over
with a rush of adrenaline
so fast didn’t quite know why
closer now emotions started
overflowing memories
blow in and cloud her mind

a few feet to close the gap
that was between them
wondering is he friend or foe
staring at him questions start
to overwhelm and
she can’t decide if she should go

the wind grabbed and pushed and pulled her
the wind took her by surprise
the wind spun as fast as she could
the wind made her want...
it made her want to fly

he was the one and only
she had let into her heart
the first to make a fire start
but knowing no devotion
she was leaving behind everything
she felt so torn apart

she turned around to hide from him
the hint of a smile
that revealed her change of heart
she felt a stirring deep inside
a breath of freedom
his look, may be the best part

the wind grabbed and pushed and pulled her
the wind took her by surprise
the wind spun as fast as she could
the wind made her want...
made her want to fly
Track Name: Mirror (feat. Gardener)
I never saw a reflection
a reflection more true
before the day I saw myself
I saw myself in you

a love separated
separated by miles of sea
call it long distance
we called it a new journey

I never heard your voice clearer
before I read the lipstick on the mirror
a dark smudge in fade-resistant pink
an eternity, but it felt like a blink
it felt like a blink

before we grow old, say to me
that we tried it all
that our time meant something more than nothing

there’s women I loved, women that loved me
they outside beautiful, but inside be ugly
people keep saying
“Gardener man go hard and let that shit go”
why would I do that when that is the most
precious feeling in my life that I’ve ever known?
I was eighteen, shit was serene
I was her fling, she was my queen
Ma it’s cool, see the truth, I’ve learned and I’ve grown
hope you can say the same thing before you go
'cause life is short like a barber’s trim
life can crush you like a pile of Tim’s
pool of sorrows and I’ma dive right in
cover my head with the clout
still don’t admit all the doubts
drowning in sorrows no doubt
they counting me out 'cause I’m down
before we grow old you will see
gettin’ back up from my knees
ensuring my future succeeds
the evils will never impede my dreams, my dreams
they something so close I can reach - Gardener

before we grow old, say to me
that we tried it all
that our time meant something more than nothing

and now I'm watching you watching me
from beyond places that I believe in
and as I hear your way with words
I lose where mine have been

it's like every page we took
was from a fairy tale picture book
and I'd forgotten how happy we looked
forgotten how happy we looked

before we grow old, say to me
that we tried it all
that our time meant something more than nothing
Track Name: Winter's Song
there is a copy of my CD in your bedroom
and I keep touching it to make sure that this is real
you say you know every word and maybe that soon
you'll know how all of the girls in my liner notes feel

but you turn down, but you turn down
the one song that I wrote for you

while you sing, sing, sing your own ending
I wanna start at the beginning baby
while you lie, lie, lie there pretending
my words quietly keep on spinning around
spinning around

now there's a pile of my clothing on your room's floor
and I know I won't be able to sleep tonight
you wonder if I ever thought of you like this before
I imagine you would've known
if you'd just read the lyrics right

but you turn down, but you turn down
the one song that I wrote for you

while you sing, sing, sing your own ending
I wanna start at the beginning baby
while you lie, lie, lie there pretending
my words quietly keep on spinning around
spinning around

while we sing, sing, sing our own endings
the truth is, we gotta start at the beginning baby
c'mon girl

while we sing, sing, sing our own ending
we gotta start at the beginning baby
while we lie, lie, lie there pretending
these thoughts quietly keep on spinning around
spinning around, yeah

some day just seems so far
let's just admit it's over
won't change the way things are
pretending that we are closer
Track Name: Making A Scene
I can't imagine a better song
coming across the airwaves now
and even if I forget the when or the how
I will not let go

of just how long you met my glance
and in the empty parking lot
asked me to dance

being here with you I can barely speak
just one word and my tongue goes weak
this movie's ending
is no longer based on a dream
'cause tonight I'll play myself
and we'll finally make a scene
yeah we'll finally make a scene

could you imagine a better view
fading away in the rearview now
it doesn't matter whether we've gone
too far 'cause I could never forget

just how long you met my glance
and in the empty parking lot
asked me to dance

being here with you I can barely speak
just one word and my tongue goes weak
this movie's ending
is no longer based on a dream
'cause tonight I'll play myself
and we'll finally make a scene
yeah we'll finally make a scene

if everything we'd done was enough
I'd find a way
no matter the price I'd pay
to never go back that way
eventually we'll need to stop
and make amends
for all of the time we've spent
pretending our days were free
and this road would never end

being here with you I can barely speak
just one word and my tongue goes weak
this movie's ending
is no longer based on a dream
'cause tonight I'll play myself
and we'll finally make a scene
yeah we'll finally make a scene

we're gonna make a scene